NANAIMO — Island grocery chain Quality Foods is rolling out its new Child-Cleaning machines, which will bathe children in UV rays.

The machines have been positioned at the entrances to all stores, and parents will be required to pass any children under six years old through the machine.

“This is the next step in making sure we’re on the road to recovery,” explained Nathan Poe, Quality Foods’ director of safety. “We know the rays are carcinogenic, but we feel confident that we’ve struck the right balance here.

UV rays have been known to damage DNA in human cells. Exposure to UV rays is known to cause skin cancer.

“But honestly,” added Poe, “if we didn’t offer these machines, we’d probably need to clean the floors more. Or something.”

The machines were moved into position by Nanaimo mayor Leonard Krog, whose internationally known vastus lateralis and semimembranosus muscles made the task quick work.