Join the email list or follow us on BlueskyMastodon • TikTokYouTube (we do not post on X or Meta platforms)

Meet Nanaimo’s New “Park Ambassador” Carole Baskin

City/Politics

NANAIMO — Former animal activist Carole Baskin has been sworn in as one of two new City Park Ambassadors.

The City says Ambassadors will be deployed to major parks to “create awareness of the importance of practising physical distancing while in the parks or on the trails, as well as share other heath-related actions that individuals can take to stay healthy and safe during the COVID-19 pandemic.”

Introduced at a City news conference this morning, Baskin told reporters “I’m just thrilled to be here on Vancouver Island. I understand you have many long dirt roads where one could bury someone in case there was, you know, some kind of tiger accident.”

Media at the news conference looked uncomfortably at each other, prompting Baskin to laugh maniacally, saying “I’m just totally kidding. Totally. Nothing to worry about with me. I’m totally fine. As long as citizens don’t cross me, they have nothing to worry about.”

City officials say Baskin was selected for her history in “making certain problems go away,” and added they feel she will be a helpful addition to the existing bylaw enforcement team.

0 Comments

Get Our Latest Articles

Join the email list or follow us on: Bluesky, Mastodon, TikTok, or YouTube (we do not post on X or Meta platforms)

About This Site

The articles on this web site are fictional works of satire.

Reader Complaint Line

Angry about something you read here? Call us at (248) 434-5508.

Keep Reading…

Nanaimo’s New “Enhanced for Fitness” Bike Lanes -3

Nanaimo’s New “Enhanced for Fitness” Bike Lanes -3

UPDATE: This story has been updated with comments from Nanaimo citizens; see bottom of article. NANAIMO — Mid-Island residents will soon have an easier way to keep fit, thanks to what the City of Nanaimo calls "Fitness-Enhanced" bicycle lanes. The lanes have raised...