“We had no idea,” said local homophobe Brigitte Lindholm. “Honestly, nobody told us.”

That was Lindholm’s reaction when she discovered that her new house paint job resembled the LGBTQ+ pride rainbow.

Lindholm, and her father Torbjörn, got the house they share painted in rainbow colours because they wanted a change from the drab grey it had been before.

“But nobody told me this was the official colour of the fucking GAYS!!!,” the homophobic Harewood resident told The Beacon in an email. “The painters really should have made that more clear!”

The home renovation company, Gay Painting Company, declined to comment. But their web site makes it clear that they will “gay up” their clients’ houses.

“I have nothing against the homosexuals, of course,” said Lindholm. “I just wish they wouldn’t parade their choices in front of all four of the children I’ve had from four different dads.”

Lindholm says she will get the house repainted immediately, and has already picked out the new colour scheme — one with pink, purple, and blue tones. It will be based on this flag, which she says she recently spotted on a web site:

“At least these colours will be family-friendly and not at all queer in the slightest,” she said.

Commenters on our Facebook page appear to agree with Lindholm: