Local homosexuals today gathered downtown to secretly coat the streets with a gay film, using cleverly designed devices which turn the film into light-weight floating orbs.
These orbs burst upon impact, coating whatever it touches with the homosexual agenda. People who came in contact with the bubbles said they suffered feelings of acceptance, love, unity, and diversity for hours after the initial contact.
To distract passers-by, the homosexuals (and others) staged a fake parade — complete with floats, music, and colourful costumes. Many people believed the parade was real, given that it had police escorts and took months of planning.
But it was, of course, just a ruse to distract from the film dispersal scheme.
Several political parties, including the NDP and Green Party participated in the sham parade.
No representatives from the local Conservative association, the upstart People’s Party of Canada were in attendance, having been obviously been tipped off that contagious gay cooties were present in the downtown core.